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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

"Expect the Best"

Sure, we’ve all heard it a thousand times… “Expect the best!” But does positive thinking really work, or is it just some cliché? It really works!! You’ve gotta use this phrase correctly, though. Keep reading to find out how…

The thoughts you think and the mental images you picture in your mind lead to your future reality. Whatever you are telling yourself and visualizing now is what will eventually come to pass in your life. For most people, it takes awhile to really buy into this concept. They’re either not fully conscious of the thoughts and images they’re feeding their minds, or they’re feeding themselves so many contradictory thoughts and images that it’s hard to figure out what’s going on in there!!

Here’s an example which hits close to home for me. Can you relate to this one? You’ve interviewed for a new job and have made it past the interview stage to the salary negotiations stage. Congratulations! But… what do you think about and tell yourself when it comes to your desired salary? Your company has offered you salary X, and you countered back with salary Y. So far, so good! You wanted more money, and you asked for it! They tell you, however, that they need some time to think this over and will get back to you in a few days. Now’s the time to pay really close attention to your thoughts.

I would venture to say that the average person (myself included) will spend the majority of the next few days focused on the following thoughts: “What am I doing to do if they don’t give me the salary I asked for? How will I pay my bills if they don’t meet my counter-offer? How will I take that vacation I’m planning if I only get x amount of dollars?” And on, and on, and on…

Sounds familiar, right?? That’s because we all do it! I think it dates back to our pre-historic days when we had to always be on the lookout for potential danger, so we could protect ourselves and not be eaten by a bear! We’re always focused on the worst-case scenario, but our thoughts create reality. Therefore, focusing on not getting the salary you want = not getting the salary you want! Initially it can be difficult to make this distinction because you may think that you are in fact focusing on getting the higher salary that you wish for. However, if the majority of your attention is actually on not wanting salary X (what your company is offering), then your attention is still on salary X, not the actually salary that you want. Bummer.

If this is you, instead steer your thoughts in the direction of what it will be like to actually receive the salary you asked for! What will it feel like to have the offer letter in your hands with the salary and benefits you negotiated for? How excited will you be when you tell your spouse that you received your desired salary? Go ahead and even decide where you’ll take your family to dinner to celebrate once you are offered the salary you desired! Do you see the difference? In the second case you are creating mental pictures of actually having the salary you would like, whereas in the first case you are feeding yourself mental pictures of being stuck with the salary you don’t want…

Unfortunately, even if you are telling yourself that you do not want something you are still focused on it. Heard the example of a pink elephant? Right now, do NOT think of a pink elephant!! Whatever you do, do NOT think of a pink elephant!! You thought of a pink elephant, didn’t you? :) It’s the same thing when you’re trying to create your ideal life. Always put your attention on what you want to create, rather than on what you don’t want to create (or what you’re trying to avoid). After all, thinking about “don’t want” = creating “don’t want.”

Here’s another example: Say you’re trying to lose weight. When you think of your body, do you think of yourself in terms of how you want your ideal body to look (hot bikini!), or do you see yourself as how you don’t want to look (x lbs. overweight)? Gotcha again, didn’t I? ;) Remember, energy goes in the direction of your thoughts. Or, what you think about is what you bring about!

Trust me, this stuff takes time if you’ve just realized all your thoughts are focused in the wrong direction. I’ve been studying this stuff for years and it still trips me up on a daily basis… but that’s part of the fun! When you catch yourself in the middle of thinking a thought that is leading you in the wrong direction, simply change the direction of your thoughts and instead steer them in the direction of that which you are wanting to create. Visualize yourself as already having whatever it is you desire, and with those thoughts and images you are literally magnetizing your ideal outcome to you... faster than you can imagine!

Post in the comments below if you have experience with the above and a story to share. I'd love to hear what you think :-)

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